CREW Austin’s September 2013 Networking Luncheon
By Rosalie G. Keszler, CCIM
I have always said that I have a terrible memory. I make use of my iPhone, iPad, notebooks, scraps of paper, other people’s business cards (sorry), all to keep appointments, reminders, notes because I constantly need to ‘refresh’ myself on the details of my busy life. So, when I saw this month’s CREW Austin luncheon topic, “Mastering Your Memory”, I was intrigued. Naturally, I forgot to register, so was a ‘walk in’ for the luncheon. I am glad that I was able to hear Craig Krause, owner and instructor of Direct Development Training, and take part in the engaging memory exercise. Chandelier, dog, floor, toothbrush… more about that later.
Krause’s focus of teaching is “Instant Recall Memory”. Results of mastering one’s own memory can be making more money and having less stress. So how can we achieve this?
Krause recommends that everyone read the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie first published in 1939, and still relevant today. Most of us have heard of the book, but not everyone has actually read it. Krause cites the Law of Diminishing Intent: “The longer you wait to implement an idea, the less enthusiasm you will have for it.” If you don’t do something within 3 days, you won’t do it. So get the book and read it. [Author’s Note: I downloaded it on iPad]
Krause asked the crowd, “Q. What is your favorite thing to talk about, outside of work? A. Yourself!” He then recounted the two things that Carnegie said about people:
1) Everybody’s favorite topic is THEMSELVES; and
2) The sweetest sound in one’s own ear is their OWN NAME.
People like to talk about their own business, their transactions, families, themselves. So, the more that you talk about THEM, the more they will trust and like you. When meeting somebody, “Ask three questions about them before you say a single thing about yourself,” advised Krause. He went on to say stop giving your credentials – nobody wants to hear your resume.
Krause stated that a physical change takes place in one’s body when you hear your own name. You can be in the middle of a conversation with somebody, overhear your name mentioned, and you perk up and ask, “Did you mention my name?” We’ve all done it. So, Krause advised, when you meet somebody for the first time, try to say their name several times.
Conversation example: “Hello, Myrtle, it’s very nice to meet you, Myrtle. So, Myrtle, who do you work for? Myrtle, let me introduce you to Margaret. Margaret, meet Myrtle.” The more you do it, the more natural it will become.
Remembering names is a documented two-step process, per Krause:
1) Stop and clear you mind and LISTEN TO THE NAME;
2) Repeat the name back, 2-3 times, within 15-30 seconds.
Say their name out loud, no less than 3 times, and don’t be afraid to ask them to repeat their name if you didn’t get it the first time. People know when you are faking it – and it makes them feel like they aren’t important enough for you to get it right.
Krause’s focus turned to business. He asked the group if their business is competitive. All replied yes, which is good – it keeps us sharp. If there are other people out there that do what you do similarly, Krause asked, why would somebody come to you and choose to do business with you? What is your competitive edge? After several different and varied responses from the audience, like location, experience, personality, response time, reputation, and customer service, Krause stated this is a loaded question because there is no wrong answer. Krause mentioned a title company that he presented his workshop for, where a woman in the crowd offered “good looking” as her answer to this question. Although Krause scoffed at first, he agreed that yes, this can be a reason that one company gets the business over another one.
But the real reason, per Krause boils down to: 1) Like and 2) Trust. LIKE is more important, because trust takes time; somebody can’t trust you without knowing you, but they can like you instantly. First impressions are made within 9 or 10 seconds. Krause went on to say that if you are liked by your client, you are almost guaranteed more commissions, more contracts, more referrals, etc. The #1 reason that doctors are NOT sued is whether the patient liked them or not.
An example of what not to do – you see somebody outside of work, but you can’t remember their name to save your life. Your thought process goes something like this:
1) “Hey, I know that guy….”
2) “Oh man, I don’t remember his name…”
3) “Oh no, please don’t walk over here…”
4) “Hey… you!”
In that instant, you remember everything else about them, like their furniture order or the date of the closing, but you can’t remember their name. Krause warns to be honest and tell them you don’t remember their name. If you pretend, and use “Hey guy!” but THEY remember YOUR name, it is bad business.
Krause stated that our memory is almost perfect – which seems contradictory to my everyday life – but he gave the example about how you can see somebody and you simply can’t remember their name – but 5 hours later, when you’re doing something else, their name pops up. This happens all the time. The #1 “killer” of memory? STRESS. If you ever forget something, don’t try to dig it out. When you stop thinking about it and reduce the stress, it will come to you.
The interactive part of the program involved audience members providing 15 different items – chandelier, dog, floor, toothbrush, rug — and the crowd taking some time to memorize the list. This seemed nearly impossible to me – and to the entire audience – especially after Krause performed nearly perfect instant recall of the list of items, and more impressive was able to identify each by number and not just the order given. Krause advised that he can teach “Instant Recall Memory” to anyone.
CREW Austin’s own Marc Bove of The Bommarito Group has experienced Krause’s workshop and recommends it for your personal and professional everyday lives. “Having taken the class over a year ago, I was pleased that the techniques came back and I was able to memorize the list fairly handily,” said Bove. This proves that either Bove has super-human powers, or Krause’s techniques actually work; maybe a little of both. Bommarito sponsored its entire office to attend the workshop training. Bove uses the memorization techniques often and said he even taught them to his teenage daughter (I call that excellent parenting).
For more information about Direct Development Training and Krause’s upcoming “Mastering Your Memory” workshops, www.DirectDevelopmentTraining.com. I hope I remember to sign up.